La Bulle Vin Mousseaux Gamay, Production Unique Rebelle (P-U-R)

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La Bulle Vin Mousseaux Gamay, Production Unique Rebelle (P-U-R)
Price: $20
Year: 2012
Region: Beaujolais, France
Retailer: DomaineLA

Growing up, I wanted to be the girl who inspired The Beatles' "Girl". That was my whole thing. I would sing that song every day after school into the tiny locker mirror I installed in my armoire. It was all I ever wanted to be. A girl who you wanted so much it made you sorry. A girl that you would breath in deeply through clenched teeth over. I wanted to be so hot, I'd ruin someone's life. Particularly, John or Paul's life in 1963. That was my dream. To be a cool, manipulative, hot bitch who got whatever she wanted and crushed men in her wake.

Because in reality, I was the girl whose friends convinced her putting a note expressing her love to Joey Lara in his locker was a good idea and he read it at lunch and it ruined my life.  Much to my dismay, I never ended up ruining Joey's life, or anyone's life for that matter, with my beauty.

It's fine. I'm over it. I'm fine with it. I mean, sure yes, I would love to still ruin someone's life with my beauty but I think that time has passed and I'm very happy and in love so I mean, yeah, it's fine. I'm fine.

The point is, I look at this bottle and I see that Girl I wanted to be. Look at her. Look at the woman on the fucking label! She is living the dream! SHE IS IN AN EFFERVESCENT BATH OF FRENCH ROSE! LOOK AT HER LEGS! SHE'S A BABE! SHE PROBABLY IS THE SAME BITCH THAT MADE LENNON SLEEP IN A TUB IN "NORWEGIAN WOOD"!

At any rate, the fact that she has time to take a bath or even a big-ass tub to take a bath in, makes her a hero.

It does help that this wine is one delightful, sparkling, little number. It reminds me of a glorious, less bubbly Lambic, all raspberry and beautiful. It's luscious, with a nice soft body. Ugh. It's too much. I'm like, about to become a lesbian for this inanimate object I've decided has slept with a Beatle or two.

Ahhhh, Girrrrr-rrlll [ssssshhhhhhhh]...

Tasting Notes: Just like a Martinelli's Sparkling Cider. Your inner child will rejoice. You can taste zero alcohol, which would be a problem but there's only 7% alcohol, so go wild! Very juicy and sweet, but very fun. Great to open a meal with, or for dessert. Or to just drink on your own on a summer afternoon while listening to old Beatles' vinyl, dreaming of all that could have been if you'd been born in the 40's.

Ross Test: Tastes like breakfast. For real. There is like no difference between throwing this back or throwing back some Cran-Raz before work.